Diet lasted 7 minutes

It’s January and so I got my near-virgin Spiraliser out the box .

Nothing has changed ,I haven’t lost 3 stone and neither do I look Jasmine or Melissa Hemsley

I couldn’t be arsed to make their Earl Grey infused Salmon with Lemon Courgetti, so I settled on cole-slaw ,with Jacob arranging the phallic looking left-over sticks of carrot amongst the Wilko night-lights on the mantlepiece- classy .

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