I sometimes wonder if there will ever be a day I am happy with my own company…at the moment ( especially cranking up to December ) it’s a no no. I just get too dam sad and ask myself too many tricky questions .I take Rosie into my head and then the yearning becomes too much , so I have to move her to one side ( I always apologise to her first ). Wish I could find that elusive ‘Peace ‘ people talk about – it’s just not happening in my brain .
But, stupid little things continue to make me happily distracted – Sabine coming back into ‘Fresh meat’ , ‘Fresh Meat’, Ant and Dec’s jokes, Hugo leaving the jungle ( but wish Rosemary was still there ), the faces that Northern Irish girl pulls in “Junior Apprentice’, a fat person doing well in ‘Strictly’ ,John and I completing the crossword, hearing from Jacob and Florence , anything to do with Jacob and Florence, Andrzej cooking dinner , Hassan ( only eats Halal meat )and Patrick ( doesn’t eat any vegetables except potatoes ) eating it , people inviting me places ( although I can’t always face going – it is still nice to be asked ) ,my students…….which leads me on to Tuesday night . I met 2 friends at Watermans for a glass of vino and to watch the film ‘The Sapphires’ . One friend remarked on my hair -“it looks different ,have you had it straightened?” she asked .”NO” I said , and then I remembered ,earlier in the day, one of my gentlest ,loveliest ASD students ,had spat into his hands ,rubbed them together and then carefully smoothed down my hair .Perhaps I should have had a shower first .
Footnoes-Andrzej is Jacob’s friend who is staying with us
. . Patrick and Hassan are students from Oslo who are staying with us .