Another bloody 21st month and it doesn’t get any easier .In fact people saying ‘isn’t it wonderful , the suns out , etc etc’ , makes it worse , because ,even though I love the sun , it doesn’t make a jot of difference to how I feel inside …and so it just hi-lights my pain. I’m glad they are enjoying it though .
Last week ,I did a Geoffrey .I tore out a little snippet from the newspaper and kept in it my purse , and when I felt wobbly I read it .Because another bereaved parent had written it ( their child was murdered on the 7th July ), I didn’t feel so stupid/lonely/isolated .
She said ”you don’t move on do you ? You just learn to live with this huge hole in your heart .There is always a hole in your heart ”
I so wish I had all my 3 children with me and that hole would be sealed – sadly ,that ‘s impossible.