Never take feeling jumpy for granted ,it is better than feeling of other stuff I cannot even begin to write about .
Have just returned from an impromptu trip to beautiful Scotland.
It was lovely to spend time with Florence and Simon and Adam and Gordana and Oona and Callum and Alison and Isabella and Gordon see ‘Spotlight’ and the brilliant ‘Anomalisa’ and have meatballs in Ikea and classy cocs in Chinaskis .
If this all sounds confusing – it is . It has all been a bit unreal .But the main reason I was there was to see and support Florence
One counsellor I saw spoke not of PTSD but of PTS – Post Traumatic Strength , and I’m a believer in it .
When really really bad stuff happens , and it doesn’t get much worse than your child dying , you change .
The way I think has changed .I value stuff more . I think I’m more patient . Dare I say it ,kinder , more tolerant and in a funny way ,stronger …more vulnerable and scared ,but stronger .
And that strength really helps – in fact I couldn’t get by without it