I read an article in the family section of the paper today.It was the horrific, tragic story of Usman Javed ,whose wife and daughter died in a botched delivery. He was quoted as saying ‘time is the worst healer’.I think about this statement a lot and it makes me quite upset when people say it ( but with the word ‘best’ ,instead of ‘worst’ ) .I think ,the person that says it ,feels fine now ,which is understandable. In the months after Rosie died , many people said ‘I think of her/you every day’ .They don’t say that now. I imagine, to them ,Rosie dying, was a shock ,a sadness , and for a while it may have effected their day to day living , but it probably doesn’t effect them now .Of course I might be wrong.
But for me ,time doesn’t heal. I am still in shock and have many lucid moments when I think that this cannot be true. She is so strong,happy,vibrant and well , I must have had a bad dream .But sadly not..It kills me that I cannot hold,touch,kiss,talk,laugh,argue,sit,walk,watch,bicker,dance with her. I will always think, crave ,yearn and love her and even though I have Jacob, Florence and John who I love desperately, I will always have a broken heart.